It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times, and now the Wooden Spooners continue to cast their eye over the biggest weekend of rugby league this season with the 2023 NRL Round 6 Results & Headlines.
Going beyond the scores, the 2023 NRL Round 6 Results & Headlines gives the extra insight in the NRL that only the Wooden Spooners can, and exlcusive stories you won’t hear anywhere else.
All reports are unconfirmed and most are completely made up, but we’ll let you decide which ones are. Any issues please contact our Legal team, and for any coaching vacancies or Luke Brooks keyboard bashing please contact the Fox League team.
2023 NRL ROUND 6 RESULTS
| Thu | Melbourne | 28 | Roosters | 8 |
| Fri | Bulldogs | 16 | South Sydney | 50 |
| Fri | North Queensland | 22 | Dolphins | 32 |
| Sat | Penrith | 44 | Manly Warringah | 12 |
| Sat | Brisbane | 14 | Canberra | 20 |
| Sun | Gold Coast | 20 | St George Illawarra | 18 |
| Sun | Newcastle | 34 | Warriors | 24 |
| Mon | Wests Tigers | 22 | Parramatta | 28 |
2023 NRL ROUND 6 RESULTS HEADLINES
FOX LEAGUE’S PAUL K_NT ACCUSES PENRITH OF BEING RESPONSIBLE FOR AUSTRALIAN INFLATION RISE – FINDS GRAPH TO PROVE IT AS HE RUNS OUT OF THINGS TO PUT SH!T ON PENRITH
Fox League’s Paul K_nt seems to have a problem with Penrith. When they win they lack class and he goes on the attack. When they beat his mate’s NRL by plenty he goes on the attack. When Jarome Luai does something, he goes on the attack. If Penrith don’t do anything, he goes on the attack. Which brings us to his latest gripe, an exclusive for the Wooden Spooners NRL Headlines.
Paul K_nt, running out of things to say about Penrith after their run-of-mill thrashing of Manly in Round 6, has put two and two together and linked Penrith with the Cost of Living crisis.
Find an inflation graph, Paul K_nt noticed that the worst of the rises coincides with Penrith’s recent domination of the NRL.
With a loyal and excitable out west, Penrith have some of the most passionate fans in the NRL, and while that has driven their team onwards and upwards to be the first team to win consecutive titles without appearing to have a wider salary cap than most for a long time, Paul K_nt says that the success has come at a cost. For all Australians.
Wooden Spooners sources say that the recent success has led to the many Penrith fans buying more merchandise than he thinks is necessary, along with brand new TV’s and Grand Final Tickets. This has seen the money spent compared to wage skyrocket and K_nt claims it is the number one reason for Inflation and therefore interest rates rises.
Some Penrith fans we canvassed coming out of the game on Saturday said that the Paul _nt theory was bs, and that he just hates Penrith. Other fans told us to f— off. While one fan said that “Paul K_nt is the biggest C_nt in the NRL media”, which is some effort considering he sits next to Buzz.
The Wooden Spooners financial expert Jurman Dax disagreed for the record.
WESTS TIGERS FAN ALREADY SICK OF JOKES THAT QUESTIONS WHETHER TIGERS WILL WIN TWO POINTS FROM THE BYE
The Wests Tigers start to the season has been pretty bad, certainly not the big shift expected in 2023 after some good signing and a change in coaching setup. Hell, they are four wins behind the NRL’s newest side whose squad looked part Qld Cup, part retirement home on paper.
Although stats show that the Tigers haven’t been that bad this season in most games, and miles better than they have been off field, their current record is 0-6. But thankfully they have the bye this weekend to kick start their competition point tally.
But that also comes at a price, as one Wooden Spooner regular and Wests Tigers explains.
“It’s not as if that bloody “Anzac” jersey was bad enough, and losing to Parra when we probably shouldn’t, and that the pr!ck Mitchell Moses was the difference, but now I’ve been ribbed all day at work from colleagues and people I genuinely hate thta the Wests Tigers would struggle to beat the bye.”
“I mean, the first one was funny, and it fell off a cliff from there.”
“I’d also like to blame Luke Brooks for most things while I’m here.”
SAVVY NRL JERSEY COLLECTOR QUICK TO GET THE WESTS TIGERS JERSEY WITH US SOLDIERS
The Wests Tigers continued their off field blooper reel recently by being caught out unveiling an Anzac round jersey with pictures of US soldiers used in the design.
Whilst this brought the usual amount of over-the-top hysteria from the Fox League team who seem to enjoy bashing the Tigers relentlessly, one person with a keen eye on such things thinks it could be a winner.
Garry, friend of the Wooden Spooners and self confessed NRL jersey addict, has managed to acquire one of these “US designs”.
He explained to us at the local Op Shop as we both scoured for obscure sporting shirts for under $5.
“People only remember the really good kits, the Grand Final kits, or the worst ones. And that means it’s worth more as an investment.”
“I mean one of my most valuable jerseys now is that Broncos away one from the early 90’s with the diamonds. People are offering me ridiculous amounts to get an original. Same with a Gold Coast Chargers jersey”
“So I made sure I grabbed one of these now infamous jerseys right away.”
When we asked if he had a South Queensland Crushers jersey he replied that “the mixture of navy blue, baby shit yellowy-brown, and XXXX Gold might sounds like a good night out up there in Queensland but it doesn’t rate as an NRL jersey investment.”
Before admitting that of course he has one.
CHANNEL NEIN LATRELL-O-METER BLOWS UP DURING GOOD FRIDAY MATCH
Pic above courtesy of Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Page
One thing Channel Nein do so well in rugby league broadcasts, and it is a very small list, is go way over the top on a handful of players, hyping them more than a mid-broadcast cross-promote.
Like SBW back in the day, where the Wooden Spooners can remember one shameful piece of broadcasting when they went for SBW’s thoughts just before he came off the bench for his Roosters debut back in the day.
Now Latrell Mitchell is one of their new hyper stars.
Not that the Souths fullback doesn’t deserve it with all the excitement he brings, it just highlights the limited range of the Channel Nein team, and why most rugby league fans would give up a take away meal every month to ensure they have Kayo.
Latrell Mitchell had a good time against the Bulldogs in the Good Friday clash, but for one fan who emailed the Wooden Spooners team it was too much.
“As if it wasn’t bad enough that I was stuck with my religious in-laws on Good Friday for a feast of seafood, but then I had to watch the Souths-Bulldogs game on Channel Nine, I mean Channel Nein,”
“And as per usual it was terrible, and all they did was talk about one player for about ten minutes. Thank Christ I only have to put up with that Nein rubbish for the next State of Origin clash.”
2023 NRL ROUND 6 SHORT, SHARP HEADLINES
NRL PLAYER THINKS HE IS AT A RODEO – FAILS EIGHT SECOND RULE
WAYNE BENNETT TREATS HIMSELF TO A SMILE AFTER COWBOYS WIN
QUEENSLAND FANS THANKFUL DYLAN EDWARDS IS THE PRINCE HARRY OF NSW BLUES AND WILL LIKELY NOT PLAY ORIGIN AFTER SCORING A MILLION TRIES ALREADY THIS YEAR AND LOOKING LIKE THE BEST FULLBACK IN THE COMP
LOCAL PENRITH FAN SHOWS MORE SPEED THAN TOM TRBOJEVIC AND DOESN’T SPILL A DROP
NRL JUDICIARY CONSIDERING CITING NRL PLAYER WHO RECKLESSLY BREATHED ON A TRAINER WHO THEN GOT COVID AND HAD TO MISS THREE DAYS OF WORK
More to come…..
WOODEN SPOONERS UNFAIR QUESTION OF THE WEEK
Q: Why didn’t the Wooden Spooners cover the Round 5 Headlines?
A: Because either we were lazy of the Wests Tigers didn’t do anything interesting enough to use.
SOCIALS OF THE WEEK
Our NRL Social of the Week is from a Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Page like it always is these days which is a must for those who love NRL, Simpsons and a laugh.
