After recently moving to Canberra for work, Terry decided to join his local cricket club the Belconnen Bulls.
While he quickly found a spot in the thirds as a right-handed middle-order bat and part-time right-arm off-spinner, there was one big issue outstanding.
Finding a new nickname.
“First of all, ‘Tezza’ was a no go! I’ve been getting that bloody name since primary school! That’s just for close family and friends now,’ said Terry.
Suggesting his own nicknames (‘The Tezman’, ‘Dr T’, ‘The Big T’) was met with the swift punishment of boundary marker duty before and after every home game.
“Terry’s a lovely bloke, but trying out your own nickname is a big no-no!” said the thirds wicketkeeper Peter. “But we let him off lightly because he’s new.”
When the season got underway, Terry’s focus turned to cricket and he forgot about the nickname search, willing to accept the dreaded ‘Tezza’ as a placeholder.
Then, a surprise solution was found.
During the closing overs of a first innings win against Hawker, Terry was given a bowl. His action was bizarre: after running in a few steps, he made a huge circular motion with his arms before reaching his delivery stride.
“I didn’t see him bowl in the nets, so I had to pull away that first ball because I was pissing myself!” said Peter. “Old mate looked like he was trying to draw big circles like he was on bloody Play School! So I started calling him ‘Circles'”
The new nickname worked, with ‘Circles’ taking 1/6 off his two overs before stumps.
Terry is happy with his new nickname. “At least it’s a bit creative and not just a shortened version of my name; gotta give Peter credit for that. Might shout him a beer later tonight to say thanks.”
Everyday News is a brand new general news/parody section of The Gurgler, and definitely not a lame rip-off of ‘The Betoota Advocate’. We swear.
