The Socceroos qualifying for another FIFA World Cup has woken up the fairweather Aussie soccer fan.
Like the AFL-obsessed Victorians who jump on the Melbourne Storm bandwagon on NRL Grand Final night, a large chunk of Australia’s population will now pretend to care about ‘football’ later this year, at least until the Socceroos are knocked out.
With the A-League declining in popularity and now mainly stuck behind a subscription TV paywall, the majority of ordinary Aussies polled by Everyday News’s overworked interns didn’t even know the Socceroos’ qualifier against Peru was on until they woke up this morning (Tuesday, June 14) and saw the result on Facebook.
”Soccer is a ‘sport’ for drama queens and sissies who couldn’t hack playing real footy, but if the Socceroos made the world cup then I might pay attention. I probably won’t watch any of their games, but I’ll try and keep an eye on the scores and maybe watch the highlights if the Aussies win, but it’ll probably be 0-0 draws. I think there’s a lot of those in soccer,” said one anonymous punter.
Everyday News is a brand new general news/parody section of The Gurgler, and definitely not a lame rip-off of ‘The Betoota Advocate’. We swear.
