A 30-year-old man has faced an early mid-life crisis.
A proud gamer during school and university, Simon received a rude shock at a family birthday party.
“I saw my 14-year-old nephew was playing the new fighting game Blood Spawn. I heard the game was pretty hardcore, so I joined in. He destroyed me! He won eight fights in a row, but he must have gotten bored and let me win the last one. It was humiliating!” said Simon.
“I used to be a hardcore gamer. When I wasn’t studying or out with mates, I’d be playing the hardest games possible, clocking them, and bragging to anyone who’d listen how brilliant I was. Unfortunately, this was before ESports was really big, otherwise I might have had a crack at that.”
But as Simon’s accountants job took over his life, his gaming time dwindled.
“I still gamed, but I didn’t have time for the epic sessions I used to do, and I didn’t want to stay up forever on the weekends anymore. And a handful of relationships, that didn’t work out, took up a bit of time too.”
Though Simon is determined to regain his standing as an epic hardcore gamer.
“After I left the party, I went straight to the nearest EB and bought Blood Spawn. I’ve got plenty of leave up my sleeve, so I’m going to block out some time, master this bloody game, and destroy my nephew at the next family party in September. The little bugger won’t know what hit him. You’ve awoken the beast, my friend.”
