It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times, and now the Wooden Spooners have returned to cast their eye over the latest weekend of rugby league that was with the NRL Round 18 Results & Headlines.
Going beyond the scores, the NRL Round 18 Results & Headlines gives the extra insight in the NRL that only the Wooden Spooners can.
All reports are unconfirmed and please contact our Legal team or Buzz Rothfield aka Hans Moleman for complaints.
NRL ROUND 18 RESULTS HEADLINES
YOU KNOW WE’RE BACK IN NRL MODE WHEN THE BUNKER MAKE ANOTHER PITIFUL DECISION THAT SH-TS FANS TO TEARS
With the State of Origin boxed and buried for another year, and journalists debating the merits of Qld and NSW jerseys, it was time to get back to the NRL.
Luckily the NRL ensured that rugby league fans knew the NRL was back with a controversial and pitiful decision in the very first game between Cowboys and Sharks.
The Bunker went on to ruin other moments across the weekend, but it ensured it was back in the focus of rugby league fans with an early stuff up.
DISGRUNTLED WESTS TIGERS FAN WHO HAS ABUSED LUKE BROOKS ALL SEASON CHEEKILY ENQUIRES IF CENTRAL COAST DRIVER WHO STOPPED TO KICK THE BALL BACK IS AVAILABLE TO REPLACE LUKE BROOKS
From – Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Page
Luke Brooks has had the second highest amount of unfair criticism this season at the Wests Tigers, behind Michael Maguire from the Fox League jerks trying to crowbar Shane Flanagan into that job. Whilst Brooks is failing to live up to the hype and pay packet, he is far from the worst NRL player of all time.
People like Mike Phillips (fake name) would disagree and have done so for the past three seasons or so. Or for a time period since a certain bus headed west.
So it was a typical NRL weekend with Phillips bagging Brooks on his Twitter account with the barely amusing handle @StripesButNoStars2005.
JOEY MANU PROMISING MID PLAY MAGIC SHOW NEXT GAME AS HE SEEKS VOLUNTEER FOR HIS NEXT TRICK
Roosters star Joey Manu had quite the game on Saturday for the Roosters against the Dragons, earning many a Supercoach point for the canny investor.
But he divided the NRL world with his feigning injury late in the game before exploding with pace and setting up yet another try.
Some say it was a brilliant piece of thinking, others that it was unsportsperson-like.
Undeterred, Manu exclusively revealed to the Wooden Spooners that he will attempt a magic trick this weekend mid sprint. There was a glimpse of a tall black hat protruding from his shorts, giving a hint of what’s to come for Round 19.
SOUTHS AND BULLDOGS ALLEGEDLY OFFERED BONUS MONEY FOR PUTTING ON 50+ POINTS AS A LEAD-IN TO THE MATTY JOHNS SHOW
Origin saw the final game of the weekend played in the premium timeslot of Sunday 6pm, and has been a regular haunt of the Bulldogs in 2022. But it’s fair to say that the 6pm Sunday games haven’t been great.
Producers of the Matty Johns Show have reportedly, according to our source, promised a $5000 Mad Monday bar tab to both sides at the Star Casino if they combined for 50 points or more, to ensure punters hung around for the later start time of the Johns-Hindmarsh-Fletcher yuk-fest.
The teams could taste those Vodka-Red Bulls in September as the total score flew past the half century.
Fans of the Matty Johns show were delighted with the usual content of in-jokes and many, many references about their own careers and the highlights/lowlights.
WE LOVE ALEX JOHNSTON
Alex Johnston grabbed yet another hat trick on Sunday night and is on his way to be the leading try scorer of all time. Who can deny he doesn’t deserve it.
Nothing cynical here, Alex Johnston is great, and may he lead PNG to World Cup glory (or semi finals).
SHANE FLANAGAN CALLS WESTS TIGERS v PENRITH PANTHERS THE WORST GAME OF THE SEASON IN A THINLY VEILED GRIPE AFTER THE WESTS TIGERS APPOINTED TIM SHEENS AND BENJI MARSHAL AS THEIR COACHING FUTURE AND ENDED A 12 MONTH CAMPAIGN OF WHITE-ANTING AND NON STOP WESTS TIGERS BASHING BY JAMES HOOPER, BUZZ ROTHFIELD AND HALF OF THE FOX LEAGUE WRITERS TO LAND THEIR MATE A GIG
Nothing more to add, refer below.
JAMES HOOPER AND FOX LEAGUE WRITERS MOVE QUICKLY TO TRASH ANOTHER TEAM – PROBABLY TO GET THEIR MATE SHANE FLANAGAN ANOTHER JOB
Just a few days after the Wests Tigers coaching news it is no surprise that the Fox Sports website has an article about Dragons in trouble, and coach potentially in trouble.
While the Fox League team should be respected for the speed at which they work, let’s hope the Dragon slaying isn’t as bad as the Tigers bashing.
2022 BECOMING A GOLDEN SHOWER INSTEAD OF A STORM FOR MELBOURNE
Melbourne’s loss to Canberra on Sunday was the first time in several seasons that the multiple title winners have lost three in a row.
Worse still, they lost Ryan Papenhuyzen again to injury, and probably for the rest of the season. This is in addition to a growing injury toll.
With a lot of their older players retiring to the bayside of Redcliffe next season, is their era of success coming to an end?
Local Victorian based observer Wright Stevens (fake name) stated exclusively to the Wooden Spooners “i love rugby, and if they Storms don’t make the Grand Final, I’ll be disappointed not to see my only game of the year.”
Proper Storm fans told us on the way out of AAMI Park that it’s all under control.
In possibly related news, steam was seen coming from the vicinity of the changeroom.
GREAT WEEK FOR CAMERON SMITHS
It has been a great week or so for the Cameron Smiths of this world.
- Former Qld Origin great Cameron Smith helped guide Queensland to an unlikely series win as an assistant coach.
- Golfer Cam Smith wins the British Open.
- Local tradie Cameron Smith wins $3000 on a Poker Machine at the Kedron Wavell Services club on Wednesday night after watching the Origin game there.
SOCIALS OF THE WEEK
Our NRL Social of the Week is from a Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Page like it always is these days which is a must for those who love NRL, Simpsons and a laugh.
THE SHANE FLANAGAN NEW COACHING GIG-O-METER
With Shane Flanagan in the commentary box for Fox League in 2022, we can continue to expect subtle digs at teams who are struggling and that he can see a possible way in for.
So each week as part of the Wooden Spooner’s NRL Headlines, we’ll bring you the New Coaching Gig-O-Meter. This features which teams are hot for a new coach, or a team that was and is going cool.
With the above news that the Wests Tigers are going back to the future with Tim Sheens and Benji Marshall, this means the year-long campaign to shove Shane Flanagan in as the Tigers coach is over.
Flanagan is running out of clubs, but that won’t stop the Fox League machine, also as per above.
Perhaps a Dragon may be involved.
