A hardcore video gamer has made a difficult moral choice during his 14th birthday party this weekend.
While he loved most of his presents, Jarrod’s well-meaning grandmother bought him Freddy’s Island Adventures, a pathetically easy platformer designed for young children.
While normally Jarrod only plays the hardest of hard games on the hardest difficulty setting like a proper gamer should, a ‘guilt trip’ look from his parents meant he accepted the game with good grace to make his grandmother happy. He even pretended to be struggling a bit so the present seemed worth it.
“Bless my mum,” said Jarrod’s mother, “I said that Jarrod liked video games, so she went to the local BIG W bargain bin in the electronics section and picked out the first game she saw. The old duck has no idea what video games are; her idea of a fun game is the crossword one I put on her iPad. She loves that.”
As soon as the party was over, Jarrod finished the game in 30 minutes and went on to play other – far more suitable games – that his other gamer friends bought him, like Blood Pact 23: Super Hardcore Mode. While he wanted to trade Freddy’s Island Adventures towards another game at his local EB store, Sharon insisted he keep the game for the sake of his grandmother, even though he’s never going to play it again.
While Jarrod is expecting to be teased by his mates for playing “a stupid games for babies”, he’s already taken screenshots of his high scores to show them how brutally he aced it.
Everyday News is a brand new general news/parody section of The Gurgler, and definitely not a lame rip-off of ‘The Betoota Advocate’. We swear.
