February 4, 2025, 7:03 am

WOODEN SPOONERS | The Dolphins’ Top Secret Weapon

With The (Redcliffe) Dolphins struggling to sign any marquee players so far, NRL CEO Andrew Abdo has revealed his radical plan to ensure the Dolphins are immediately competitive.

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For their first season only, The Dolphins will start with 24 points before round one, all but guaranteeing them a finals berth.

“We’ve invested a lot of time into this new expansion team, and we need them to be successful straight away: ideally a finals spot in their first season and premiership within five years,” said Abdo.

While the 16 other NRL clubs have issued a formal complaint, Adbo has already trashed it.

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“The NRL is an entertainment business!” said Abdo. “Remember when the aerial ping pong bastards brought in GWS and the Gold Coast and they both got smashed every week. We can’t afford for The Dolphins to be our whipping boys for the first few seasons, that’s what the Tigers and Dragons are for!”

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