RESULTS | Israel Folau Jerk of the Month for June 2019

Former rugby union, rugby league, AFL player and Creflo A Dollar admirer Israel Folau can now add the title of Israel Folau Jerk of the Month to his trophy cabinet, as he been overwhelmingly voted in as the June 2019 Jerk of the Month by our readers.

His campaign for cash to pay for legal fees after his dismissal has really irked Gurgler readers in June 2019, so perhaps aside from the millions that he will have spare after legal fees, he will have comfort in the Jerk of the Month award. Noting that there is no physical award to hold.

Proving that some people need only to be nominated for their regular everyday behaviour to feature highly in the Jerk of the Month voting, Michael Slater came in second. People no doubt actually looking for Ad Breaks during play when “Slats” takes the microphone during the Cricket World Cup.

Same applies to Hard Rubbish scavengers, the ibis of the neighbourhood.

Tennis tantrum fans may be disappointing that Nick Kyrgios only finished fourth for his dummy spit at Queens, but never fear, Wimbledon is here and another nomination is only a few sets away.

A few other first timers will be better for the run, with an eye on their future progress.

For now, here are the results, and the regurgitated reasons they were nominated in the first place.

RESULTS – June 2019 Jerk of the Month

Here’s the final voting for June 2019 Jerk of the Month. 

ISRAEL FOLAU June 2019 Jerk of the Month

ISRAEL FOLAU

Why nominated for the Jerk?

Folau is quickly making himself the most hated sporting star in Australia, although sporting star is a loose term as he was sacked by his sport and was only playing rugby union anyway.

His campaign to raise $3M via GoFundMe to pay for legal costs after his sacking, has taken away any shred of compassion or likability, and he is now faced with only a few of sport’s dirtiest paths to make his money. French rugby, Chinese Soccer, FIFA board member.

Although, there is still room in his schedule to start a Creflo A Dollar style early morning TV preaching show.

Jerk Rating: 9/10

Other Nominations – June 2019 Jerk of the Month

NICK KYRGIOS

Why nominated for the Jerk?

With Wimbledon around the corner, we thought that our favourite tennis jerk (Kyrgios is strangely 200% more likable than Tomic, perhaps that’s because Kyrgios may actually win something one day) would save himself for the big SW19 tournament for his best jerk work. 

Being the professional jerk that he is, he found time for a dummy spit in the Queens tournament in London last week, celebrating another early round loss by hurling his racquet out of the court.

Hopefully a sign of bigger things to come for Wimbledon.

Jerk Rating: 10/10

MICHAEL SLATER

Why nominated for the Jerk?

There’s nothing like a big sporting tournament, and the Cricket World Cup is a good one to follow, Australians have pumped themselves up for the tilt at back to back titles in England.

And then Michael Slater’s voice comes on the television screens, and enthusiasm for the cricket, and life itself plummets.

Thankfully all TVs are installed with the Michaelslater Underwhelming Tripe Eviction function aka MUTE button.

F— Michael Slater.

Jerk Rating: 9.7/10

BEN STRATTON

Why nominated for the Jerk?

Ensuring that AFL players keep up with other sports in the Jerk of the Month nominations, the Hawthorn AFL is nominated for pinching.

Yes, pinching. 

AFL can be a niggly game, with melees mixed in with sly punches and elbow, and the occasional shirtfront, but pinching is the most pissweak way of annoying a fellow player. And is only the work of a jerk.

Jerk Rating: 5/10

STEP ONE UNDERWEAR SALESMAN

Why nominated for the Jerk?

If you have Foxtel you’re probably sick of the Queen song and the fact that Foxtel always offer better shit to people who aren’t Foxtel customers than who are. But loyalty is no longer rewarded these days.

You would also have seen the man trying to flog off his jocks, no pun intended. Sure they’re made of bamboo, and they are probably at least 31% better than the leading brand f something or other, but most of Australia doesn’t want to see your plum hammock for 30 seconds every 10 minutes.

Jerk Rating: 2/10

HARD RUBBISH SCAVENGERS

Why nominated for the Jerk?

Sure, people have to make a dollar anyway they can. But surely you can do it without being the biggest, most inconsiderate jerk in the world.

The Hard Rubbish scavengers invade suburbs the weekend before a kerbside collection takes place in various suburbs around Brisbane when it is their turn, and cause annoyance to all.

They have their vehicle setups akin to the opening scenes to the Beverley Hillbillies, and drive around a single figure kmh trying to scope the kerbside for the discarded piece of shit they can turn into a few bucks.

Doesn’t matter about anyone else on the road, in their house, or on the planet if there is the fourth unwanted fridge they could grab.

Some of these jerks even go into people’s yards and houses and take stuff that is on offer, thus proving their low life credentials.

Thankfully for most suburbs, these creatures only come around once a year.

Jerk Rating: 10/10

NOOSA

Why nominated for the Jerk?

Noosa is bored of tourists, and want to get rid of them.

Why wouldn’t you want to keep a nice part of the world to yourself we guess.

But what a bunch of snobs, and jerks.

Jerk Rating: 7/10

2019 JERK OF THE MONTH HALL OF FAME

Here’s this months winner so far.

All go into the end of season Jerk of the Year draw.

May 2019 – Nick Kyrgios

April 2019 – Fraser Anning & Foxtel

March 2019 – Fraser Anning & Christchurch Shooter

February 2019 – MKR & Tara McWilliams

January 2019 – Tennis Jerks, Fox Cricket, Channel Seven